The Helps

I remember being proud and blessed to have had help since childhood who treated my brother and I as if we were their own child and both our parents who does not restrict their activities.

Bu, who was apparently older than Grandma at that point of time, took care of me during my infant period and loved me so much that she gave me a 100 MYR packet after she left. What I heard from Mom was, she was the first and only help that Grandma was fond of.

Sokah, from Cambodia. She knew zero English when she came in. Jon was still a newborn and I just started primary school.
The first night, Mom drew in detail objects that would be of day to day use and wrote the words beside them for Sokah to remember. Mom patiently taught her the pronunciation, spelling and use of each object.
It was a strange sight for me as these were what I already knew. As a kid, the things you knew somehow becomes odd if someone doesn't-as if these knowledge were assumed to be instilled. Nonetheless, Sokah got used to our daily routines and she grew closely to my baby brother.
I sometimes felt she was overprotective of him but it was probably because of the fact that the was a baby.

Suharti. My Kakak.
She came after Sokah when Jon was in kindergarten and pretty much throughout my primary school years. This was the period where Mom and Dad were busy at work and I suppose they trust her in a way that she could bring us out to the nearby convenient store to grab snacks. Suharti was my primary line of communication for all the gossips that were happening in school and I remember forcing her to listen to my repetitive practices for a story telling competition.
She was a huge part of my childhood.
I'm not sure how we drifted apart or even when.
I miss her.


Now that Jon and I are old enough to think for ourselves, Mom stopped hiring for help but it became apparent that after Grandma's stroke episode, we had to. That was when our blessings pretty much ran out.
Two helps have ran away and both left all their belongings at home. I got angry and reacted in disbelief thinking they will return at the end of the day. It felt as if someone who lives with you everyday, walked out of your life one find morning without a word.

I just hope Grandma does not feel neglected.

Mom is being a trooper right now by taking care of Grandma and everything else (cooking, cleaning, her job, bills, commitments, Jon's education). I feel useless and wonder what I can do to alleviate her burden. Sigh
I'm not too sure what Mulan would do either. All I thought of was to track the help that ran away and bring her back but that is silly. If to run away was their choice, let it be but the agency should not penalise their customers for that! I could top up the allowance for Mom but I would need to do additional OT every month to compensate this to achieve my financial goal.

If Mom can support her two kids on top of taking care of her Mother, I can to.